Happy Fourth of July! We know that our non-Yank readership doesn’t care about our special day, especially you Brits. In fact, Stephen Merchant has explained why our holiday of independence rankles his British self—and how things would be better had Britain won. (If you’re in the UK, the language is NSFW; if you’re in America, crank the volume up all you want—those silly British curse words don’t mean anything over here.)
But since the UK came up second best in that particular contest, we are free to launch fireworks on this special day. Unfortunately there’s no prerequisite for intelligence when doing so. For one thing, my fellow countrymen, please don’t launch fireworks while your dog is off-leash. In the following video this dog appears to have been trained by Al-Qaeda, though thankfully things do not end badly:
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